I went home for Christmas break where I played this game that my dad got for Christmas. it’s called Blokus. In Blokus you get different shaped pieces. they are all flat and each if made up of 1 to 5 small squares. the goal of the game is to place all of your pieces on the board before the other players. the thing is that each of your pieces has to touch the corner of another of your pieces when you lay it down.  the problem arises when the other players mess everything up by putting their pieces down. I would come up with the coolest plans, line everything up perfectly in my head with all the pieces in just the right place. then someone else would put their piece in my spot, or put a piece down that would block off an entire section where i had wanted to expand into. stupid other players. don’t they realize that they are supposed to stay out of my way and allow me conquer them? dont they realize that my plans are more important than whatever crap they have dreamed up? yeah apparently they didn’t get that memo…ugh…

It can really suck having to make decisions. Even worse, sometimes you stress and struggle and lose sleep over a decision until you finally make one…and then in order for that decision to pan out it relies on someone else’s decision or participation…and if they make the wrong decision or don’t cooperate then you are just plain effed because the other option or options are no longer available and so it pretty much sucks to be you…or in this case me.

obviously the problems and decision i refer to have nothing to do with Blokus…but the frustration i feel of late and the ruined state of my hopes and dreams…well they feel a lot like when I lost at Blokus…just…bigger…harsher…

I mean every guy wishes he could just pick a girl and she would automatically be into him as well. they would agree on everything and compliment each others’ personalities perfectly. Then they live happily ever after right? No not right.

every person wishes they could do what they love every day. and get paid for it. they all want that dream job that is both enjoyable and challenging. Not only do they want that dream job, they want to know way in advance exactly what type of job it is that would match their personality. because no one wants to waste years or decades in a certain field only to find out down the road that is completely the wrong place for them.

Maybe in the end what it comes down to is that we wont all know exactly where we should be…and even those of us who know where we want to be…maybe going there just isnt realistic. lets face it, most of us will end up stuck in a job doing something we dont really love. we will stay there because it is what we are used to and it pays the bills…in a sense we find that comfortable. On top of that we will have families to provide for and caring for them and making them happy in the long run is more important than getting to do what we love every day…or at least that is what i keep telling myself.

ugh, i hate making decisions.